Comparisons...

The beginning of a new relationship can be exciting, adventurous and all together fun. After the first few weeks, or months, or even years (depending on the relationship) people start to get to know each other more and more everyday, and while we are learning about each other, we need to understand that every person and every relationship is different. The factors involved in the relationship are different, the backgrounds of the people involved are different, and the day to day interactions are different. This is just the fact of life.

That said, one thing that can be difficult in a new relationship is when the partners compare the other to past relationships (or ex's). Whether one is intentionally doing it, or unintentionally, the action itself can be devastating. Similiar to comparing stores.... have you ever walked into a chain store that is not your 'regular' store? While, the merchandise they carry is pretty much the same, the layout, or quantity, or selection may vary slightly... and you start to think of why or how you like the other one better. Or you walk in completely expecting the 'pharmacy' to be to your right, so you walk the entire right hand length of the store, until you finally realize that it is in the back, or to the left, or maybe this one doesn't have a pharmacy at all... it can be frustrating! Its not just me that does this right?

Whether you are comparing the good or the bad of a relationship, i feel that the comparison factor in general is a bad idea. "My ex used to 'blank' for me" or "My ex would never do that" or just talking about your 'ex' to often can be a bad sign for your partner. When you start to compare your partner, they begin to think that they are not good enough, or this relationship is not good enough, or some parts of this relationship are not good enough, but some might be better... All in all, its just probably not a great idea.

Maybe, its just that one person reads into it to much, or has concerns, or fears that they don't fill the shoes the way they wish they could. Perhaps they just need reassurance that the ways they are feeling are unfounded, and that they do not need to feel that way. Perhaps if they were already getting those reassurances, they wouldn't feel "compared" in the first place?? Well, I suppose only time will tell... and the reality of it all will set in.

Another Random Rant.... complete.