A Great Friend!

Have you ever wondered if you were a good friend? I often think that I have good friends, while others could leave something to be desired, but atleast they try. I wonder about my friends sometime, I wonder if they think I am a good friend. I try to be, but doesn't everyone? I suppose we try the best way we know how, but every now and then we realize that we have a GREAT FRIEND. This great friend may be someone you have know your entire life, or it could be one you have known for only a couple years (or months), but in that short time they have made an impact on your life. That impact may hit you one day, like a ton of bricks, or it could sneak up on you and you won't even realize it happened.

I have one such experience, this friends impact came up on me and by the time I had realized how significant it was, it hit me like a brick to the face! My friend, we'll call her Sandy, has been in my life for a few years, and in those years she has quietly (well, not quietly, but we'll get to that) stood by my side in good and bad times, in happy and sad times, and in the best and worst of times. Sandy laughs with me, cries with me, and can just simply sit with me, with no words needing to be said, no void to fill, and no questions asked.

To give you a little history (unless you've been following my blog - and read into my analogies and subliminal messages) I recently went through a break-up, and it was pretty hard on me. First, it was unexpected, second it was for (what I believe to be) terrible reasons (stupid, stupid cheater!). I took this break-up especially hard because I had finally let myself open up to someone, which is something that is very difficult for me to do, and when I finally let my guard down, and allowed him into my whole being (heart, mind, soul)... BAM!!! A brick to the face, and we were done. Well, during the break-up Sandy was supportive, she listened to me vent, she tried to cheer me up, she reminded me that life goes on, and that I will inevitably be a better person from this experience.

After the initial shock was over, Sandy made a few innuendos to some things she noticed during my relationship. While she didn't come right out and say things (too harshly), she did let me know that she had some concerns. One thing she was concerned about was that when I was with him (and most of my other long term relationships, for that matter) I gave in too much. I never stood my ground, I never let my thoughts be known, I just simply conceded to what ever it was he was saying, or wanted me to do, or that he wanted to do. Now, if you knew me, you would know that this is ENTIRELY not me. I have a sarcastic tone to almost everything, I try to keep everything light and fun, and while being easy going, I am firm about what I believe, and what I do or don't want in my life. Well, apparently, I was not this way with him. He walked all over me, I never spoke up, and I just sat quietly while I was slowly starting to resent my own life (and him) for how I was being, and how I was being treated.

Enter Sandy.... Sandy often reminds me when I am doing something she doesn't like, she calls it like she sees it, and she doesn't (I mean DOESN'T) settle for anything less than she expects. Sandy is loud and boisterous and from an outsider's view, Sandy can leave the impression that she is a bitch, or that she is cold. But, truly, I think it is because Sandy has learned to guard herself and stay one step ahead of the game. Sandy doesn't let a lot of people close to her (similar to me), but the ones who do get the privilege, will find it worth the time, as she is also loyal, and caring, and full of spunk and ambition!

So, to my point. Sandy has taught me to stay a little firmer on my ground, stand up for what I want, think or believe, and most certainly not to settle. I catch myself regularly speaking up, standing a little taller, or more confidently, and not being concerned so much about what others will think, but content in the fact that I am just being me. And for all of that, I know that I have the best friend in the world.