Totally random thoughts....

Did you ever think about what your life would be like as a movie? I do, often in fact. I'm not quite sure I could fit my entire life in one movie... It may need to be a boxed set, either way, I think it would be interesting. Arranging the movie would probably be the hard part. Should it go chronologically, or should it be done in according to similar events?

For Instance, Part one could be a drama, to include my brother's tragic murder, and the steps leading to the acceptance and recovery from these events... but truly, how much would people really want to watch a movie about that? I can imagine those who are gluten's for punishment, might enjoy it, but most of us don't actually think to ourselves "I'm in the mood for a cryer tonight", right? Well, I know I don't, I actually steer away from them, if at all possible. So, perhaps I could make a movie about my adventures in parenting, but that is pretty cliche, and overdone. So, I can't imagine it would be anything that would interest people. So I guess that leaves my often interesting, and sometimes hilarious relationship experiences.

I'd like to think that my history with relationships isn't abnormal, more like atypical. I'm pretty easy going, and that can be both good and bad. "Bad?" you ask, "how could being easy going be bad?". Well, I assure you it can. I am the type of girl who is 'OK' with just about anything. I don't care where we eat, I don't care what movie we go see, I don't care what we do tonight, because generally I am happy no matter what the events, as long as I'm surrounded by good company. Well, that hasn't played out for me very well, in the past. For example, he asks me, "what are our plans for tonight", I simply state, "It doesn't matter to me, what do you want to do", to which I am hung up on. OK, maybe there was a bad connection, so I call back. Nope, he definitely hung up on me, I'm not quite sure why at the time, but he later explains that it annoyed him that I wouldn't make a decision [we won't go into the fact that he didn't tell me that he wanted ME to make the plans]. I know, its stupid to me too, but it happened! So, yes, being easy going can be a bad thing. I suppose it can be a good thing too, because I'm not picky, not at all. I can enjoy myself just about anywhere, doing just about anything. In my mind, its a good thing, so I think I'll stick to it.

I've had several other funny experiences as well. Well, now that I look back on them, they are hilarious, but at the time, not so much. I was once broken up with because while having no reason to think that I would be unfaithful, they were afraid that I might succumb to the temptation, and cheat while they were out of country, so they thought it would be best to just end a good thing. Weird, I know, but it also happened. Well, he eventually came back to the states, and even while broken up, I didn't involve myself with anyone, and then he got mad at me for "letting him" break up with me. I swear to God, I don't understand men! But, they are funny!

All in all, perhaps I'm just not meant to be in a relationship. I have so many guy friends that love to vent their relationship issues to me, and many of them take my advice (although, I don't necessarily recommend it), even though my advice is as objective as I can be, it may not always be the best, because I'm no expert. I once laughed at a friend who told me that he was in marriage counseling, because I thought that counseling was pointless. If you can't communicate your issues with each other, what is a "so-called expert" going to do for you? I don't have any experience, clearly, with counseling, but I feel like they aren't going to do a lot for me, if I'm not already willing to do it myself. But, I digress. As far as me being in a relationship, it's not that I don't want one, because [eventually] I do, I think. I do not, however, want to be in a relationship where people just settle on each other, because they don't think they will ever find someone right for them. I suppose I would rather be slow and methodical about it, and find out through trial and error whether someone is right for me; meaning they can handle my little quirks, my atypical personality, my easy-going attitude, my random forgetfulness and my overall silliness. Maybe someday, someone will want me just for all of those things, someday. Or, maybe, I'll just be that girl that has a lot of guy friends, and no real relationship. Only time will tell, I guess.

So, back to my movie. Perhaps, the more I think about it, my life wouldn't make a great movie, while people may laugh, cry, and could probably sympathize, there really isn't much point to the story.... Yet.

Similar to this blog, No real point, just another random rant!